Ok.

For those of you who don’t know, I play an mmo called Star Trek Online. As one would imagine, it’s a massively multiplayer online RPG game about – Star Trek. Inside the game, there are Tribbles. Now – if you don’t know what a Tribble is, I cannot help you, and most likely you should stop reading now as little of the rest of this post will make much sense to you.

In Star Trek Online, the developers had seen fit to actually include Tribbles in the game – and what’s more, they actually can induce “buffs” that assist your characters in some way, such as with regeneration from damage, healing, resistances, etc. Furthermore – Tribbles can be bred, so that you can breed the type of Tribble you want to use to get the “buff” you are specifically looking for.

Well, the other day I saw one of the wiki articles floating around about Tribble Breeding. I got to thinking that would be kinda cool to do as a side task while playing the game, so I picked up a level 1 tribble from the Exchange (because I’d replicated all the ones I’ve found as drops). I don’t have much of anything in the bank, so I put the tribble in there with some food and left it for 24 hours.

I came back – and viola! A level 2 tribble! In this particular case – a Thompson.

Now – I have a rather active imagination, and as a musician I have weird things pop into my head all the time when I see or hear things throughout the day from a music perspective. The very first thing that popped into my head when I saw it was a Thompson was that old ’80′s song by the Thompson Twins – Hold me now.

Well… I just couldn’t get it out of my head. Like – all night. Then this morning I started joking about making a parody about tribbles… and rambled off a few lyric jokes to my friend… which got me rolling.

And here it is. It’s a parody all about tribbles in STO, sung to and replacing the lyrics of the Thompson Twins – Hold me now.

(For those of you not familiar with tribble names, you can find the names of the tribble breeds here on this chart – http://img641.imageshack.us/img641/9…rchyanidea.jpg)

——————————————————–
Thompson Tribbles – Pet me now

I have a tribble
I keep to myself
I hold it and feed it and pet it whenever
I’ve lost me some health

It’s always here with me
In my pocket it’s stored
It purrs and it stirs and it shakes and it makes me
feel like I’m adored

[chorus - sung by tribble]
Oh, pet me now
Oh, let healing start
Don’t sell me!
Let my purr soothe your heart
Let all Klingons depart

I only have one now
I wish I had two
I’ve seen other’s who’ve made a small fortune by selling
Zincs, Daxters and Yus

So perhaps I should breed it!
Yea, I’ll breed me some more!
I’ll take all the young and I’ll sell them all inside
the Sol Exchange store

[chorus - sung by tribble]
Oh, pet me now
Oh, let buffing start
Don’t sell me!
Take my buffs to impart
Wipe Klingons off the charts

Oh, pet me now
Oh, let regen start
Don’t sell me!
Let your arm grow it’s part
Like a piece of fine art

[bridge]

Now I’m on an away team
My Ricossa in hand
I left all the rest in my stateroom back on
the U.S.S. Portland

Oh no, look at that Redshirt!
He’s all tattered and torn!
Well, if he’d taken the Nielson I’d offered we wouldn’t
be having to mourn

[outro chorus - sung by tribble]
Oh, pet me now (I’m really not a two bit part)
Oh, let healing start (let me help you play your part)
Don’t sell me! (ooh don’t sell me!)
Let my purr soothe your heart
Let all Klingons depart

Oh, pet me now (I’m really not a two bit part)
Oh, let buffing start (let me help you play your part)
Don’t sell me! (ooh don’t sell me!)
Take my buffs to impart
Wipe Klingons off the charts

Oh, pet me now (I’m really not a two bit part)
Oh, let regen start (let me help you play your part)
Don’t sell me! (ooh don’t sell me!)
Let your arm grow it’s part
Like a piece of fine art

[fade out]